The maelstrom of my mind...

I used to joke with my friend Pete about what was playing in the theater of my mind. I guess I've always been a star there. As of late though I find that star somewhat diminished by what is now more like the maelstrom of my mind... Hence, I have had little to write about as my attention is pulled elsewhere though I can't really pinpoint where that "elsewhere" is... though it's certainly more internal, which has left me pondering less about things I have written on before, such as east coast lobster vs. west coast lobster. Therefore I haven't written much in the last two months.

However, given that my only two loyal readers are clamoring for more pathetic brain drool (hi SM and KF!), I have come to deliver. First, regarding thirty. It came and went with little fanfare. Still shocking to think "I'm 30", but aside from that not much has changed. I guess being thirty is what you make of it. I'm basically unwilling to say more, but you'll find out if you haven't already... As Everlast would say in a dreamy sort of way, "Everything must change." That includes age, so let it happen cause you can't stop it.

30 has seen me hit Hawaii, which was for a too ridiculously short time. Just about the time I realized I was on vacation in Hawaii, it was time to go and almost get bumped from our flight back. Well, it was my rookie trip, next time I know I've got to stay longer...

In other news I'm suddenly acquiring music again. Something I havne't done for years. At one point in college I had about 500 cds, maybe not that impressive a number today, but back then it was a pretty huge amount. I had a huge purging sale which funded most of my junior year. I've been relatively stable since then with 60-90 cds. Well, i've starting pawing through used cd stores in my free time again. I'm not sure what I'm hoping to find, but I am finding a lot of stuff

I continue to find myself fascinated by the good v. evil theme I rambled about a number of months back. More specifically, the idea of the old adage "the road to hell is paved with good intentions." How your thoughts can head into gray areas where you make decisions and act based on what you think is right at the time, only to head further away from the direction you really wanted to be going. I keep reading books, stories, watching tv, movies, etc that are driving this theme home. Of course the idea is all over our pop culture, but I've only just realized I'm really seeking out representations of this right now. I'm wondering why though. Why is this resonating with me so much? Where are my shades of gray? They are there. Black and white is vanishing into gray. Not that I'm descending down a comic book type slope of evil, but I'm sensing gray areas developing... It's kind of a strange feeling that I'm not accurately describing...

Anyway, apparently in my "old" age, I just ramble on about crazy nothingness. Oh wait, I did that in my youth too.

I'll be overhauling my blog on the other side of Pearl Habor Day (visited Pearl Habor in Hawaii, found it a bit of a disappointment for what took place there). Anyhow, I'll be changing my blog's focus (as if it has one) purpose (as if it has one) and goal (as if it has one).